life in chaos
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Safe Distances
Not being close—well—that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Earlier this morning, I was firmly reminded of that. At times, I want to ignore the unease I’ve felt for so long… but then again, I realize that doing so makes me very uncomfortable. I have worked very hard to better my behaviors. Simplifying my life has… Continue reading
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You Won’t Need Other Friends Anymore
I feel less like death warmed over today. I’m not sure what happened yesterday. I didn’t use my notebook. And you know what? I probably didn’t write it down because I didn’t want to remember. Tonight, I’m going to be up, as my assignment was changed yesterday morning. I’m also dealing with general groans and… Continue reading
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Oh, Good Deal
No clue what to even write about today. My day is a fast blur. Want to do some writing tonight. And eat some popcorn. Got no cleaning done today… and I’m not that upset about it. The pace today was hectic too, so… Yeah. I can voice my sadness with the takeout situation though. I… Continue reading
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I Will Go Down With This Ship
Today’s title is courtesy of a line from one of my favorite Dido songs. So… I figured out around midnight why I was such a wreck on Friday. First, a terrible event occurs. Time passes and you start to come to terms with it… You learn to adapt and accept it. You have no choice… Continue reading
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One Moment In Time
This must be one of the worst days I’ve had since this year started. It’s not because of someone else being rude or cruel to me. It’s not because of being sick and in pain all day—which I was. Instead, it is because my mental state seemingly deteriorated over the course of the day. It… Continue reading
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Recharge
I’m trying hard not to think about what it means if my bloodwork shows evidence of muscle breakdown. Some of the possibilities are very detrimental to my overall health. I don’t like this – the constant sensation of feeling so tired and weak. One thing I do know is that I have got to find… Continue reading
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Woe
I knew something was wrong when my desire to sleep was stronger than my desire to update my blog tonight. I have a notebook labeled ‘Days,’ and I’ve been using it to log what I did over the course of the day. Why am I doing this? Because otherwise I won’t remember. Instead of my… Continue reading
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It’s Fine To Make Mistakes – You’re Only Human
Burning. On fire. Aching. Stabbing pain. Extreme fatigue. This is what I’ve experienced today. I’m not sure if it’s due to the cold or that my fibromyalgia is getting worse. Probably the latter. I’ve been struggling so much just trying to travel up and down the stairs today. My back and ribs hurt so much.… Continue reading
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When Out Of Rome…
We do what we wanna do. I’m trying to navigate this whole thing… logging my day and stuff by hand. It’s so strange. But my memory loss is becoming this scary thing that I don’t think I’ll be able to easily come to terms with. I’m uncertain if I’m suffering from the beginning of a… Continue reading
Hey, Miss J! 