life in chaos
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Calling In Backup
I’ve been trying to avoid addressing this, but since my life a pretty open book, I might as well note it as well… I’ve been pretty transparent about problems involving my health, but every time I hear something new, I get more frustrated. I was scheduled to see a neurologist to figure out why I… Continue reading
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Oh The Things I Could Do
I’m uncertain if this would count as one of those things one would wish or the reality they want to see themselves in. Honestly, it’s probably both. So… me in an alternate universe would have both of my parents alive and my mother wouldn’t have any of the problems that she suffered with. My little… Continue reading
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There Is No Real Limit
I am curious about many things, not everything out there, mind. But many things. These aren’t frivolous internal musings about why the sky is blue or grass is green. Part of it is about how certain body parts work down at the microscopic level. I wonder what a tardigrade would look like if I looked… Continue reading
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I Don’t Know What To Even Say About This
It’s currently 4AM in the morning, and I had a day planned. One of grocery shopping, my lesson, some driving… but right now, I’m struggling not to pull my hair out. I went to plug in my vacuum cleaner and saw bite marks all over the cable and even where it plugs into the machine.… Continue reading
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Based On Recents…
Security can at times be an adventure. I’ve recently acquired a home security system. In the time since I’ve had it, I’ve had two people attempt to pull my front door open. One of them, unfortunately, was a local politician. I’ve met her in person. She’s very mean. And claimed she never came past my… Continue reading
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More Questions
… I have more of that than answers. I was discharged before 3AM this morning and had to get a Lyft home. I was told that everything was fine. That my brain was fine and my heart was fine. I was very scared because on top of the stabbing pain that rippled from underneath my… Continue reading
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I Would Call It Paranoia Really…
Before I had my stroke, the main thing I was worried about were people committing fraud to steal my property. Now? I’m afraid to be alive. Because as long as I am alive, I know that my life can end abruptly and painfully. I’m worried that I’ll die with no arrangements at all and my… Continue reading
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Why Do I…
… I don’t know if I’m dealing with mood swings or a sudden nosedive into the beginnings of a depressive episode. Does it matter? I’ve been told and treated as if my mental health problems are irrelevant. It’s irritating and hurts and it’s just… Some days, I wonder why even bother? I have a feeling… Continue reading
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Perspectives
I hope I don’t have a blog post with this title already… I really… really hope I don’t have a problem with some of these new leanings in the next few days. Since I’ve found myself feeling extremely depressed to the point of sickness… I’ve decided to not let the madness keep going. I’ve never… Continue reading
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How Do You Ch..?
I’m very happy to be able to write stories that others can enjoy. Out of all the things I can do, this is most certainly the best. ~J. Lyst Continue reading
Hey, Miss J! 