Hey, Miss J!

I’m sure that it might seem odd, for me to be talking to myself while I’m out and about dealing with life stuff. It’s not that difficult for me to understand.

I have so little contact with people outside my friends.

I won’t mention family, because I started trying to mend fences… and it seems that some of the same terrible stuff is there.

Or most of it.

Maybe they pretended to be nice to me all to gain my attention and try to suck me in again. I honestly don’t need that. I’m still unstable and don’t need the emotional upheaval.

Not when I already have enough chaos and mayhem in my head.

I also just noticed that my dad called me about four hours ago. However… I have him and his sister blocked on my mobile phone again. Probably by tomorrow, I’ll put the matter to rest and figure out how to block them on my landline.

I really don’t need it. Talking to them can be such a waste of time. And so draining…

Now… mind, this is the me who is currently listening to some soothing Kenny G.

Got groceries today… and I needed to clean out the fridge. I’m dreading the task of cleaning out my deep freezer. The further down I go, the more goat cheese I find.

Which isn’t exactly a bad thing…

But there’s so much of it.

I also have a turkey down there that I need to munch my way down to.

Got so many veggies in the freezer, I’m gonna have very good few weeks. In the fridge, got bags and bags of salad and lettuce. Cucumbers and watermelon. Apples, grapes… even oranges and prunes.

Stupidly didn’t look correctly when I ordered shredded cheese. So now, I have 64 ounces of shredded cheese.

I have greens too and turkey necks, so I might be fixing myself a huge pot of greens at some point. I tend to wipe those out very quickly.

I actually feel well today since I’ve been eating so many vegetables and fruit. Trying to include cabbage in as many meals as I can. Even if as a side all on its lonesome.

I didn’t bother to track my food, which is fine and dandy because I can’t even remember what I had for breakfast.

I might go back to writing a meal planner for the week. It seems so much simpler than me scrambling to figure out what on earth I was going to eat.

I think I’ll be eating pancakes every morning this week.

These aren’t normal pancakes, mind. They’re protein pancakes.

I also have those steaks I picked up. I slice through those with kitchen shears, then season them and pan fry them with Pam. Though this time around, who knows? Maybe I’ll cut them up and toss ‘em in the air fryer.

I do know that I want some beef lo mein this week.

Got plenty of onions and potatoes. So I’ll no doubt be making and eating fries every day.

EVERY.SINGLE.DAY.

I’m fine with that.

I’m going to be up most of the night. Even though I took my anxiety meds, I’m not yet tired enough to just go plop and be conked out.

I have my new assignment ranges for the week.

Will see how it goes.

Gonna write a bit before I speed clean through this house. Cat room and basement might get ignored. IDK. Depends on how I feel.

Hmm… Maybe 30 minutes of writing will put me in a good enough mood, eh?

~J. Lyst