Hey, Miss J!

I am always perfectly capable of being impractical and imperfect.

If there’s ever been anything that I’ve been consistent with – it’s never completing anything. I have several totes filled with incomplete ideas; and lots of sketchpads full of unfinished art.

I’m still staring at the manuscript for a novel I originally published in 2013. It needs heavy revisions as since its conception, I’ve grown more aware of the importance of punctuation and continuity.

My note-taking has improved, yes, but that’s all.

Or… at least that’s how I felt at first.

Giving myself a word minimum challenge helped me literally explode in my writing. I gave so much more thought into it. There were times that were difficult, but the trip I’m still on has been nothing if not enjoyable.

Navigating The Curve was sitting stagnant at Chapter 9… and I really thought it would be history repeating itself. I never was good at maintaining posting schedules, and I never had completed stories. Anywhere.

Full stop. Now, I’m back working on NtC because I have new ideas. I need to apologize to my readers. You all did not deserve this kind of absence.

Considering that I have over 90,000 words (I think) in NtC to date, I should give myself the relief of finding out what happens in the fic and sharing it with everyone. I’m on pins and needles when I’m writing because I have no idea what’s going to happen. My outlines are extremely brief… I have to fill in the gaps.

“Do what you love.” … Is what was suggested recently by my doctor. Along with going on a picnic and having a nice cold drink while outside. I enjoy exercise and writing (and napping, but who doesn’t like a good nap??) I’ll never be able to exercise like I did over a decade ago, but I can still write. At least for now. I need new frames.

Ugh.

Anyway, I really want to complete this story. Will I have sequels? I have no idea. I’ll resume working on OA soon too, just not right away.

I haven’t been holding up well under pressure and trying to limit a storyline to primary cannon is intensely stressful. I’m almost afraid of “Open Arms” because while the mental visuals are beautiful, I’m worried about messing up somewhere. My X-Men knowledge is painfully lacking.

I’ll do my best though.

Now then, new goals:

• Less anxiety. I watched various videos of birds chirping and disconnected from televised news for about two days. Between that and medication, I am doing a little better.
• Completed my CompTIA Cert. Yiikes. This is taking longer than I want. Resuming writing might calm me down enough to think clearly enough.
• Resume writing for OA and NtC. Currently in progress. For NtC at least.
• Complete Video Edits. Have the videos. Need to pen time for edits and rendering.
• Complete Audio Edits. Have the files. Need to either turn into video for DVDs or burn to CDs.
• Create a schedule. Must include sleep. Can’t have hobbies overlapping each other.
• Pictures. Need to take more of these.

I also need to stop being so disappointed in myself. I’m a person, even if I feel like an incomplete one.

I shouldn’t still be mourning something I never had, right? It’s been over three years now.

If only life was that simple.

Till next time!

~ Miss J

Will this post ever be narrated in my own voice? I suppose you’ll have to follow my ‘Podcasts’ page to find out.